Arguing with the wife again.....

[godale03]

Hey Guys,

We are finally moving stuff back down in the basement! Whoo Hooo! I am moving most of my stuff into the RC room, and the wife is moving stuff into the storage room. Well I am running out of space to store some of my stuff, so I used a couple of shelves in the storage room. Now I did ask before I did this so I thought I was ok. Well last night while we were busy moving stuff around she comes down all frustrated and asked why I have my stuff here on the shelves. She thought I was going to move some of the stuff once I made room in the RC room. Well I was running out of space and thought what is it going to hurt if I just keep the stuff there. Well she asked me why I didn't move my stuff yet and when I told her I was going to leave it there she got all frustrated and said "well we are running out of space here and you have your room for all of this." So to make a long story short I moved my stuff out of the Storage room and into the RC room and filled the closet to capacity. Now I have a bunch of stuff that still needs to go down there and no place to put it now. I started throwing alot of stuff away as well. Nothing really important. Mostly stuff from my childhood and old electronics. I still had an Atari 2600, Nintindo, and my PS1 (Chipped) that all got the round file treatment. She is not throwing much away however. We are not planning on having any more kids yet she is still holding on to two strollers and two car seats. Anyway I think we have gotten over that argument... but I am still kinda frustrated. I just figured I would vent. I will never understand women..... Remind me again why we get married? LOL

Tom

 

[bustedgears]

One thing I could advise is to just suck it up and make room for your stuff to go. Build a couple of shelves if it will keep you out of an argument.

I'm not saying just take everything off of her that she dishes out, but you can at least say you've tried. It's better than not doing anything and giving her one more thing to throw in your face later.

 

[godale03]

I guess it all goes back to the old "Pick and choose your battles" I guess I had no choice but to :surrender

Tom

 

[Monkey Wrench]

You got rid of a classic Atari? Man, don't do that! I love those things and regret ever getting rid of mine!

Your point about the baby stuff is valid and you need to confront her on that. There's no sense in keeping that stuff around if you are not planning on having another kid in the near future. That's easy money sitting there, man. There are places that buy that stuff and resell it! My wife, about two or three times a year, goes through both my kid's closets for clothes and toys they no longer wear or play with, packs it up and takes it to a place called "Once Upon A Child". They buy it back and either she can take cash or store credit. She usually splits it because they have some really nice stuff there, so she buys some new clothes for the kids using the credit, pockets the cash and the kids get new poop withoutme having to spend any more money!

Yeah, pick your battles for sure, but this is one you need to fight for, in my opinion.

 

[sweetdiesel]

Women keep a lot of items for sentimental value. The same way you value your video game consoles, she is doing the same with the baby items. You both know that you won't be having kids in the near future, but you both also know that you won't be whipping out that old atari any time soon and playing a game of pong. It works both ways. IMO fighting for storage space is silly, either make room for your crap or get rid of it. Or better yet, get rid of all the old consoles and get one of the newer consoles. The new console will take up less space and you will be more likely to use it.

 

[godale03]

It is really killing me to get rid of the Atari, SD is right... I don't exactly pull it out for a game of Space Invaders much. I am trying to meet her half way on as much as I can. My point last night was two things.... One... I will get rid of the stuff I haven't messed with in years if in turn she would try to do the same. Second..... if we do not have the space for it.... we either make space or can it. I guess I could have been a bit more tactful, but she kinda ticked me off last night so I was a bit of a smartarse..... I guess I felt I was ditching more things than she was and I guess I felt a bit jaded. Either way we will work it out..... fighting over space is really foolish because there are only two ways out of this... keep it and find space, or can it. We will be giving a bunch of things to good will as well. It seems we fight over the stupidest things though!

Tom

 

[Monkey Wrench]

Women keep a lot of items for sentimental value. The same way you value your video game consoles, she is doing the same with the baby items. You both know that you won't be having kids in the near future, but you both also know that you won't be whipping out that old atari any time soon and playing a game of pong. It works both ways. IMO fighting for storage space is silly, either make room for your crap or get rid of it. Or better yet, get rid of all the old consoles and get one of the newer consoles. The new console will take up less space and you will be more likely to use it.

Clearly, you were one of the kids that didn't have an Atari! HA HA HA HA HA!

You have a point, but strollers? The minute my daughter started walking, the strollers were HISTORY! Sure, we keep some little things from when they were babies and will always keep the crib they both used, but things like strollers and car seats get moved out as they grow.

I guess it's all about compromising on what's important to each of you and realizing that there are some things that have got to go. If I'm you, I'm at least hanging onto the Atari and working with her to maybe keep just one of the strollers.

SD is right, though. Arguing about storage space is silly for both of you. You just need to put that foot down, bang your chest and grunt, "My basement! My stuff!"

Then make sure the couch has a blanket and pillow

 

[godale03]

Ok... you have talked me into saving the Atari! I just hope it doesn't start another :argue: The nintendo goes... the Atari stays. Foot Down! I am not real sure why she wants to keep the strollers and the playpen. The no kids thing is a mutual decision, and it was her that brought it up in the fist place. I think I have her getting rid of at least one of each. We shall see.

Tom

 

[WyldSeaMaiden]

Okay maybe butting in, but I have to comment. WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU THINKING???? I need a little more info, however, my ex-husband & I used to fight over space. My point of view was I couldn't park in the garage because he had his car stuff there......you know all those classic cars he was going to restore so he was always buying parts, etc. Then the basement was his are for his stupid sewing maching that he never used. He bought to do the interior of all those cars. Of course the desk area he had to have stuff there also. I was angry and frustrated that I didn't have my own area of the house. I didn't want to look at all those stupid classic car magazines in the office. Anyway I felt that he was greedy and didn't respect that I needed space also. Even though that didn't cause our divorce, it certainly didn't help keep us together, but it was just another straw on the camel's back. As far as the strollers are concerned my best guess is your wife thinks it would be sweet to maybe use them for grandchildren. You know, being able to tell your grandkids that your mom/dad used to use this stroller. Lighten up on the space issue. Build a shed, some shelves or rent a storage.

 

[rossb]

I would NEVER throw away those old video game systems. I would also save old computer setups (Apple II, Commodore PET, etc..)

 

[SMaxxin]

I guess it all goes back to the old "Pick and choose your battles" I guess I had no choice but to :surrender

Tom

LOL I can agree with that. I don't have anything in our bedroom, all my poop goes in the spare room (with the small closet) because she needs all of the space in our room...At least she lets me sleep in there LOL

I built a storage shed for my mower and four wheeler and before it was complete she had so much stuff in there the four wheeler wouldn't fit. Women are pack rats just learn to accept it

 

[robmob]

Okay maybe butting in, but I have to comment. WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU THINKING???? I need a little more info, however, my ex-husband & I used to fight over space. My point of view was I couldn't park in the garage because he had his car stuff there......you know all those classic cars he was going to restore so he was always buying parts, etc. Then the basement was his are for his stupid sewing maching that he never used. He bought to do the interior of all those cars. Of course the desk area he had to have stuff there also. I was angry and frustrated that I didn't have my own area of the house. I didn't want to look at all those stupid classic car magazines in the office. Anyway I felt that he was greedy and didn't respect that I needed space also. Even though that didn't cause our divorce, it certainly didn't help keep us together, but it was just another straw on the camel's back. As far as the strollers are concerned my best guess is your wife thinks it would be sweet to maybe use them for grandchildren. You know, being able to tell your grandkids that your mom/dad used to use this stroller. Lighten up on the space issue. Build a shed, some shelves or rent a storage.

Come on now.

Wives have their space too.

It's called the kitchen.

 

[bustedgears]

Come on now.

Wives have their space too.

It's called the kitchen.

:trout: :trout: :trout: :trout:

Don't forget the 25lb purse most women carry around.

 

[godale03]

Okay maybe butting in, but I have to comment. WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU THINKING???? I need a little more info, however, my ex-husband & I used to fight over space. My point of view was I couldn't park in the garage because he had his car stuff there......you know all those classic cars he was going to restore so he was always buying parts, etc. Then the basement was his are for his stupid sewing maching that he never used. He bought to do the interior of all those cars. Of course the desk area he had to have stuff there also. I was angry and frustrated that I didn't have my own area of the house. I didn't want to look at all those stupid classic car magazines in the office. Anyway I felt that he was greedy and didn't respect that I needed space also. Even though that didn't cause our divorce, it certainly didn't help keep us together, but it was just another straw on the camel's back. As far as the strollers are concerned my best guess is your wife thinks it would be sweet to maybe use them for grandchildren. You know, being able to tell your grandkids that your mom/dad used to use this stroller. Lighten up on the space issue. Build a shed, some shelves or rent a storage.

What info are you missing? What do you mean what was I thinking? I will be glad to fill in the blanks......First off I have moved all of my stuff out of her "Spaces" ie, the dinning room, the spare bedroom, the living room and the like. This isn't an argument about me wanting to move all of my stuff into any available space. We are actually consoldating all of our things after our recent marriage. I had a complete house full of things as well as she. We are in the process of weeding through all of that stuff and throwing away all of the things we don't need want etc. The argument we had was very minor and definitely not a knock down drag out kinda thing. I do respect her spaces and I know she respects mine. Our biggest issue was that she thought that I was not going to store any of my stuff in the storage room... or at least not much of it. Some of that is unavoidable. Anywho I was a bit upset by the fact that most of my things were getting tossed and she seemed to hold on to everything. I was not against her holding onto a stroller and a car seat. My beef was keep one and throw the rest out. We will work through this and it is by no means a major issue. Just one of those compramises that all married folks need to make. The whole reason we finished the basement was to have more room. We have accomplished that however I don't think either of us thought we had that much crap. Oh... and by the way... We actually use our garage to park the cars and if we have to store something in the garage temporaraly... I am the one who volunteers my stall. It's all good and thank you for you opinion. I just wanted to set the record straight about it being just about my collection of crap.

Cheers!

Tom

 

[rocknbil]

godale why are you still thinking in terms of "mine" and hers?" It's "ours" man! This is one of the big things that divides couples.

Relate this to her and she'll start thinking that way too.

I, too, am a packrat. It's hard to let go but here is what I came to. Be honest with yourself: will you **EVER** find the time to break out some of that old stuff and use it? No. Time runs shorter and shorter the older you get. You discover new toys and new things to do. The old poop is just a memory, it's going to stay on the shelf or in the box and you know you'll never actually put it back into service.

So year after year, you spend time and energy moving this poop from one place to another, taking up your precious time and energy of which you have less and less every day, and the only satisfaction you get out of it is the initial memory and grin you get just before you move it. Sooner or later you start resenting it.

Let "old poop" pass out of your life and dump it. Have a yard sale, let it be someone else's "new poop" for a while. After the stuff you will NEVER use is gone, you'll have more room for . . .








NEW STUFF!

 

[godale03]

godale why are you still thinking in terms of "mine" and hers?" It's "ours" man! This is one of the big things that divides couples.

Relate this to her and she'll start thinking that way too.

I, too, am a packrat. It's hard to let go but here is what I came to. Be honest with yourself: will you **EVER** find the time to break out some of that old stuff and use it? No. Time runs shorter and shorter the older you get. You discover new toys and new things to do. The old poop is just a memory, it's going to stay on the shelf or in the box and you know you'll never actually put it back into service.

So year after year, you spend time and energy moving this poop from one place to another, taking up your precious time and energy of which you have less and less every day, and the only satisfaction you get out of it is the initial memory and grin you get just before you move it. Sooner or later you start resenting it.

Let "old poop" pass out of your life and dump it. Have a yard sale, let it be someone else's "new poop" for a while. After the stuff you will NEVER use is gone, you'll have more room for . . .








NEW STUFF!

I get what you are saying Rocknbil. I guess it is hard to consider the stuff I had before her... "ours" but you are exactly right. When we said I do.... that was the last time I should be using "I" . We merged as one that day and I need to remember that. I have talked to her today and we will figure this whole thing out. You are right... I have to let go... Out with the old in with the new... RC stuff! I collect way to much crap and I guess the memories.. the good memories are the reason I hold on to that stuff. I can remember when it was new. I mean I still have an original Sony Diskman! Thanks for the insight.

Tom

 

[rocknbil]

... we said I do.... that was the last time I should be using "I"....

The going joke is that when a woman says "I do" that's the last thing she ever does.

<ducks>

 

[olds97_lss]

Wives have their space too.
It's called the kitchen.

I tried that line with my wife... I now have a dent in my forehead that matches one of her stilettos...

For "stuff", I have half a closet and half a spare room. Our bedroom is split 50/50. I get one side of the dresser, she gets the other. Same with the closet.

I get a corner of a shelf and half a magazine rack in the bathroom, she gets the rest of the room. Kitchen, hers. Dining room with pantry cabinets, hers. Living room with cabinets/storage, hers.

I throw stuff in the trunk of her car when she isn't looking... like the floor jack, the car waxing supplies and the 4-way wrench.

We live in an apartment, so compromise is a must or we would kill each other. We also found out that it's really easy to throw a lot of crap away when you move. We have about 1/3rd less stuff after we moved a month ago because we didn't feel like boxing it up.

 

[digger]

Am I weird?
(don't answer that.)

I have my stuff and she has her stuff. Then we have "our" space.
I work on my r/c in the basement most of the time.
But there have been times that it sit on the kitchen table for a few days. I'll work on it on the coffee table in the living room, but I clean up when I quit. I have rebuilt a carb out of a Jeep on it and she didn't say anything.
That's redneck, but it was the best place at the time.

Her deal is candles. The living room is full of them. I mean trashed up full.
I got some pics of the grandkids the other day. Couldn't figure out where to put them. I just left the pics lay and she made room for them.
Did I mention I hate candles? But I still know when to keep my mouth shut.

 

[ImBroken]

I, too, am a packrat. It's hard to let go but here is what I came to. Be honest with yourself: will you **EVER** find the time to break out some of that old stuff and use it? No. Time runs shorter and shorter the older you get. You discover new toys and new things to do. The old poop is just a memory, it's going to stay on the shelf or in the box and you know you'll never actually put it back into service.

So year after year, you spend time and energy moving this poop from one place to another, taking up your precious time and energy of which you have less and less every day, and the only satisfaction you get out of it is the initial memory and grin you get just before you move it. Sooner or later you start resenting it.

Let "old poop" pass out of your life and dump it. Have a yard sale, let it be someone else's "new poop" for a while. After the stuff you will NEVER use is gone, you'll have more room for . . .
NEW STUFF!

NCNitro needs to read this post... lol