Phone call from Daddy
> >>
> >> **Rrriiiiinnnnggg, rrriiiinnnngg,**
> >>
> >>
> >> **'Hello?'**
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> **'Hi honey.**
> >> **This is Daddy.**
> >> **Is Mommy near the phone?'**
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> **'No, Daddy.**
> >> **She's upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Paul.'**
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> **After a brief pause,**
> >>
> >>
> >> **Daddy says,**
> >> **'But honey, you haven't got an Uncle Paul.'**
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> **'Oh yes I do, and he's upstairs in the room with Mommy,**
> >> **Right now.'**
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> Brief Pause.
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> **'Uh, okay then, this is what I want you to do.**
> >> **Put the phone down on the table, run upstairs**
> >> **And knock on the bedroom door and shout to Mommy**
> >> **That Daddy's car just pulled into the driveway.'**
> >>
> >>
> >> **'Okay, Daddy, Just a minute.'**
> >>
> >>
> >> **A few minutes later**
> >> **The little girl comes back to the phone.**
> >>
> >>
> >> **'I did it, Daddy.'**
> >>
> >>
> >> **'And what happened, honey?' **
> >>
> >>
> >> 'Well, Mommy got all scared, jumped out of bed with no clothes on
> >> and ran around screaming.**
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> **Then she tripped over the rug, hit her head on the dresser**
> >> **And now she isn't moving at all!'**
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> **'Oh my God!!! What about your Uncle Paul?'**
> >>
> >>
> >> **'He jumped out of the bed with no clothes on, too.**
> >> **He was all scared and he jumped out of the back window**
> >> **And into the swimming pool.**
> >> **But I guess he didn't know that you took out the water**
> >> **Last week to clean it.**
> >>
> >>
> >> **He hit the bottom of the pool and I think he's dead.'**
> >>
> >>
> >> *****Long Pause*****
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> *****Longer Pause*****
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> *****Even Longer Pause*****
> >>
> >>
> >> **Then Daddy says,**
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> **'Swimming pool? ...........**
> >>
> >>
> >> **Is this 486-5731?'*
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> **No, I think you have the wrong number..........
Group Therapy
"A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small children. 'You all have obsessions,' he observed.
To the first mother, Mary, he said, 'You are obsessed with
eating. You've even named your daughter Candy.'
He turned to the second Mom, Ann, 'Your obsession is with money. Again, it manifests itself in your child's name, Penny.'
He turned to the third Mom, Joyce, 'Your obsession is alcohol. This too shows itself in your child's name, Brandy.'
At this point, the fourth mother, Kathy, quietly got up, took her little boy by the hand and whispered, 'Come on, peepee, this guy has no idea what he's talking about. Let's go pick up Peter and Willy at school and get dinner started.' "
> >>
> >> **Rrriiiiinnnnggg, rrriiiinnnngg,**
> >>
> >>
> >> **'Hello?'**
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> **'Hi honey.**
> >> **This is Daddy.**
> >> **Is Mommy near the phone?'**
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> **'No, Daddy.**
> >> **She's upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Paul.'**
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> **After a brief pause,**
> >>
> >>
> >> **Daddy says,**
> >> **'But honey, you haven't got an Uncle Paul.'**
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> **'Oh yes I do, and he's upstairs in the room with Mommy,**
> >> **Right now.'**
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> Brief Pause.
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> **'Uh, okay then, this is what I want you to do.**
> >> **Put the phone down on the table, run upstairs**
> >> **And knock on the bedroom door and shout to Mommy**
> >> **That Daddy's car just pulled into the driveway.'**
> >>
> >>
> >> **'Okay, Daddy, Just a minute.'**
> >>
> >>
> >> **A few minutes later**
> >> **The little girl comes back to the phone.**
> >>
> >>
> >> **'I did it, Daddy.'**
> >>
> >>
> >> **'And what happened, honey?' **
> >>
> >>
> >> 'Well, Mommy got all scared, jumped out of bed with no clothes on
> >> and ran around screaming.**
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> **Then she tripped over the rug, hit her head on the dresser**
> >> **And now she isn't moving at all!'**
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> **'Oh my God!!! What about your Uncle Paul?'**
> >>
> >>
> >> **'He jumped out of the bed with no clothes on, too.**
> >> **He was all scared and he jumped out of the back window**
> >> **And into the swimming pool.**
> >> **But I guess he didn't know that you took out the water**
> >> **Last week to clean it.**
> >>
> >>
> >> **He hit the bottom of the pool and I think he's dead.'**
> >>
> >>
> >> *****Long Pause*****
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> *****Longer Pause*****
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> *****Even Longer Pause*****
> >>
> >>
> >> **Then Daddy says,**
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> **'Swimming pool? ...........**
> >>
> >>
> >> **Is this 486-5731?'*
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> **No, I think you have the wrong number..........
Group Therapy
"A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small children. 'You all have obsessions,' he observed.
To the first mother, Mary, he said, 'You are obsessed with
eating. You've even named your daughter Candy.'
He turned to the second Mom, Ann, 'Your obsession is with money. Again, it manifests itself in your child's name, Penny.'
He turned to the third Mom, Joyce, 'Your obsession is alcohol. This too shows itself in your child's name, Brandy.'
At this point, the fourth mother, Kathy, quietly got up, took her little boy by the hand and whispered, 'Come on, peepee, this guy has no idea what he's talking about. Let's go pick up Peter and Willy at school and get dinner started.' "
