digger
Hardcore RCTalk User
A young ventriloquist is touring through the southern United States and stops to entertain at a small bar in Texas. He's going through his usual stupid Redneck jokes, when a big burly guy in the audience stands up and says, "I've heard just about enough of your smart ass hillbilly jokes. We ain't all stupid here in the South."
Flustered, the ventriloquist begins to apologize, when the big guy pipes up, "You stay out of this mister, I'm talking to the smart ass little fella on your knee."
During a recent hot spell in Atlanta a hillbilly collapsed on the street. Immediately a crowd gathered and began offering suggestions.
"Give the poor man a drink of whiskey," a little old lady said.
"Give him some air," a man cried out.
"Give him some whiskey," she cried again.
Several other suggestions were made and the victim suddenly sat up and hollered, "Will all of you shut up and listen to the little old lady?"
And her is one for Rolex, since he is in Tennessee.
In the mountains of Tennessee there is a gaunt hillbilly who is still untouched by the complexities of modern economics. He depends on the nearby river and forest for his fish and meat, grows a few vegetables, and drinks spring water. A neighbor visited him recently and urged him to wise up, move to a city and get a job in a factory that was paying high wages.
"You ain't getting anywhere just staying here where you was born, doin' nothin'," the neighbor said.
"Ain't gettin' nowhere?" the hillbilly exclaimed. "I wouldn't say that! When my pappy died and left me, I didn't have nothin'. But look at me now. I got nine dogs!"
What's the difference between a normal zoo and a hillbilly zoo?
On the cage in a normal zoo, it will have the name of the animal and the scientific name in Latin.
A hillbilly zoo will have the name of the animal and a recipe.
Flustered, the ventriloquist begins to apologize, when the big guy pipes up, "You stay out of this mister, I'm talking to the smart ass little fella on your knee."
During a recent hot spell in Atlanta a hillbilly collapsed on the street. Immediately a crowd gathered and began offering suggestions.
"Give the poor man a drink of whiskey," a little old lady said.
"Give him some air," a man cried out.
"Give him some whiskey," she cried again.
Several other suggestions were made and the victim suddenly sat up and hollered, "Will all of you shut up and listen to the little old lady?"
And her is one for Rolex, since he is in Tennessee.
In the mountains of Tennessee there is a gaunt hillbilly who is still untouched by the complexities of modern economics. He depends on the nearby river and forest for his fish and meat, grows a few vegetables, and drinks spring water. A neighbor visited him recently and urged him to wise up, move to a city and get a job in a factory that was paying high wages.
"You ain't getting anywhere just staying here where you was born, doin' nothin'," the neighbor said.
"Ain't gettin' nowhere?" the hillbilly exclaimed. "I wouldn't say that! When my pappy died and left me, I didn't have nothin'. But look at me now. I got nine dogs!"
What's the difference between a normal zoo and a hillbilly zoo?
On the cage in a normal zoo, it will have the name of the animal and the scientific name in Latin.
A hillbilly zoo will have the name of the animal and a recipe.
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