World's Shortest Fairytale

[RatzoRC]

Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl "Will you marry me?" The girl said,"NO!" And the guy lived happily ever after and went fishing and hunting and played golf a lot and drank beer and left the toilet seat up and farted whenever he wanted.



THE END

 

[FastEddy]

And....... spent a fortune on porn site subscriptions.

 

[robriguez]

And...... spent whatever was left over on RC.

 

[Plaidfish]

and still lived happily ever after....

 

[jetmechG550]

With Rosie and her 5 sisters!

 

[rossb]

And....... spent a fortune on porn site subscriptions.

You can get tons of porn for free.

 

[digger]

You can get tons of porn for free.

Can also get tons of women for free and don't have to marry one. :devious:

 

[4u2nv]

Ratzo you had another dream again last night didnt ya bro?

 

[Revo Rancher]

And the guy lived happily ever after and went fishing and hunting and played golf a lot and drank beer and left the toilet seat up and farted whenever he wanted.

I'm married and still do that. What's different is now I share my smell in the morning.

Cigars=wife repellant.

 

[jetmechG550]

Oh cigars are great the morning after! Nothing better than morning breath topped with Fuente breath!

 

[RatzoRC]

I'm married and still do that. What's different is now I share my smell in the morning.

Cigars=wife repellant.

I'm gonna take a guess and say that you don't have any children...

 

[Revo Rancher]

^^Yep^^

 

[RatzoRC]

Have some kids and get back to me on this one....I'll be here. lol

 

[Revo Rancher]

I think my wife would have the hardest time adapting, Ratzo. I admit I have my own selfish interests, (R/C, beer, 'me time') but most of my activities now are home or family oriented, such as traveling in the coach or just hanging around the house doing small chores and such, spending time with the in-laws. No more golf, no more buddy nights out, everything neat and clean and picked up, toilets down, etc. In fact, I am better about being clean and picking up than my wife. I am ten times more picky about things.

Plus, it is my wife that gets up and farts and burps for half an hour each morning. Who needs an alarm clock with all that going on. All my disgusting stuff is done within 5 minutes of getting up!

 

[RatzoRC]

A typical day at my house.
Lets take today for example.
Up at 2:40am to take care of my crying, puking daughter.
Up again at 4:00 for same reason.
Up at 5:00 to get the boys off to hockey.
Home by 7:30.
Off to the in-laws with my youngest son so he can play with his cousin, and off to basketball with my older son.
Pick the NBA star up at 10:00 and bring him to the in-laws so he could play as well.
Pick up milk, eggs, yada yada at the store.
I just got home to help the wife out, getting the baby to the doctors.
I finally have time to start working on the bathroom.
And it's only 11:45.

Ahh, family life. You just have to try it.

I wouldn't trade it for the world.

 

[Monkey Wrench]

See? There is such a thing as a parallel universe!

Let's see, here's mine:

Up at 7:00 am because my son is up and decides to CRANK his Star Wars video game up on the surround sound (yes, my amp DOES go to 11!)
Decide there's no sense going back to bed because it's hard to sleep when my wife wears her plantar facia boot to bed anyway! I feel bad for her, but I'm getting pretty tired of that damn boot!
8:00 am and my little princess is up demanding Cheerios with strawberries and juice to drink. She gets a strawberry Pop-Tart because coffee is the priority!
Decide, well, better get the boy registered for spring hockey and fall football, so get online and have to track down vitals like height, weight, birth date to complete forms so they can send me additional forms.
Take a 10 minute break to see what kurtf5 is up to and rip him on a post.
Quick shower then it's time to start my Super Bowl chili.
Now, at 1:00, I need to run to the grocery store for some munchies and the wife is off to church, so she'll be gone for three hours. Now I can get some stuff done!

Granted, not quite up to Ratzo's morning, but I wouldn't have it any other way (except maybe one more hour of sleep!)

 

[rossb]

Plus, it is my wife that gets up and farts and burps for half an hour each morning.

Ha Ha.. Oh boy!